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Confronting the other woman

The other woman is that woman known as the side chick, the mistress, his side kick, she’s that woman that is the second best that you may never know, because she’s his best kept secret.

Have you ever been cheated on by your spouse or lover? How does it feel? I mean how badly were you hurt? And how did you react?

It’s not a good feeling to find out your partner is cheating on you. The feeling alone can kill, especially when you are not sure how to approach him or her. Men are mostly very confrontational and willing to call off any relationship or even marriage once they find out she is cheating. Ninety nine per cent of men can’t stand it. Once she is caught, then it is over. One thing men do that we respect most is they often  avoid confronting their partner’s lover (that is the side cock). They would rather deal with the wife that strayed, except in rare cases, where their ego won’t let them. Even when they’ve sent the woman packing, they just want to teach the other man a bitter lesson. But same cannot be said of women who go after the other women, creating scenes most times.

Recently, I came across a woman who found out her husband was cheating on her, trust a woman when she is out to catch her cheating man, she becomes the CIA, FBI, DSS and NIA all in one. She went on a fact -finding mission and in no time she got every detail on the affair including the name and residence of her husband’s mistress. She got everything she needed to know about the other woman, but she was confused on who to confront. Should she confront her husband, or the mistress?

She couldn’t keep it any longer, so she attacked her husband’s mistress when she saw them together at a garden. She was furious and uncontrollable, she pounced on her husband’s mistress, who was caught completely off guard. Before people could gather around to separate the fight, dresses were getting torn, hairs pulled and screams rented the air. The fight was eventually ended, but the yelling continued with the name calling and slut shaming. The man in the middle of the whole mess, picked up his car keys and drove off, leaving the two women behind. He left with his head held high, because he wasn’t the one involved in the smack down. The two women disgraced themselves publicly for a man that nobody knew.

There are a lot of women in this lady’s shoes who don’t know if to confront their partner, or the other woman and even how to go about it. A lot of girls have gotten their heads broken with the heel of cover shoes by furious wives on rampage. Often times in a bid to fight for our rights as women who are cheated on, we give up our rights to get an unreserved apology, respect and undying loyalty by fighting stupidly and blindly. You are free to carry out your investigations if you suspect your husband is cheating, gather your facts, but please do not attack the other woman or your man publicly, or in the secret. I’ll tell you why. If that man whose wife attacked his side chick and gave the street a show for free is smart and vindictive, he will play the victim and get away with it. The table will definitely switch, all he needs do is to stay away from home, avoid his wife’s calls, while forming vexation. And if he ever agrees to return home or speak with her, he will continue hinging on how she embarrassed herself publicly by fighting on the street.

Smart men know how to switch the table when women act stupidly, I am telling you, except the woman above has made up her mind to walk out of her marriage or relationship and needed the show down as her grand exit. If not, she will end up apologizing to her husband for her behaviour because he will make her sick with guilt.

No woman has ever won fighting her husband or lover’s mistress, it’s so old school and not innovative. In fact, that style of attacking the other woman has left wives more broken and on the losing end, because their husbands end up feeling more sorry for their mistress and even spoiling her with very expensive gifts and their bonds getting stronger. And if you mess with some side chicks who are crazy, they don’t mind from then on chasing your husband shamelessly around. Their aim is to break you down further.

If you think or know your husband is cheating, then go ahead and gather your facts, but don’t attack him or the other woman. Don’t do that to yourself, how many women are you going to fight or threaten if your husband is a serial cheat and you are ready to continue in that marriage?

Call your man’s attention, wear an indifferent look, you are neither angry nor happy, in a subtle voice lay down your proofs and ask him to think about what he is doing to you. Don’t argue with him if he tries to be smart by half, playing the ‘so, you are now spying on me?’ don’t fall for that cheap blackmail, make your points, thank him for listening and then walk away from him. Let it sink and behave like everything is normal, not easy, but we are women remember?

Men hate it when we don’t give them anything to hold onto to switch the table on us. They are most confused when we are not angry, nagging or throwing tantrums. They want to know what is going on in our heads and they hate it when they don’t know. Most marital battles are won without raising voices, trust that how you handle this will earn you an apology from your husband, more of his respect and most of all, he will be more careful knowing very well that you are watching. He’s also very much afraid because he doesn’t know what you may still have up your sleeves.


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This post was syndicated from The Sun News. Click here to read the full text on the original website.


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